Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Welcome, Spring!

I am deliriously happy at the moment at the change of weather; parked on the porch and basking in the glorious Florida sunshine. 
I do believe my desire for a cold-weathered state has been abolished.
Spring, I welcome you with gratitude and warmth. I look forward to the gardening you promise, stuffing myself into bikinis at the beach/springs, and most importantly, your sweet transition into summer's pure bliss. 




This week has brought about new 'a-ha!' moments as I continue to create words to my innermost thoughts and struggles. I experienced a bit of a breakthrough last night while working on what our small group calls our 'wound charts.' It looks something like this:

Wound (something that happens) combines with the message, or lie, you believe about yourself, which leads to an agreement you make with yourself, then a vow you make, which ultimately comprises your 'false self.' Did that make any sense at all? Probably not. So here's an example in my own life:

Wound: poor leadership at the church I went to in Gainesville, along with feeling left out or not included at various churches we tried in Jacksonville

Message I received from that: Your faith is lacking; that's why you felt left out.

My agreement: I can't have a faith as strong as people I see at church because my faith is weak and I'm less of a Christian than they are (sounds lame, I know. But I can't help feeling this way!)

The vow I make to myself: I'll pray for change, but it has to come on my own terms and it can't be too challenging. 

How I feel about myself (my "False Self") --I'm mediocre Christian. 

Whew! I did three more for various reasons, and it was SO stinkin' cool. I'm probably not making it seem as powerful as it is, but before last night, I couldn't articulate why I felt the way I did about my faith, and I realize it went way back to college and being 'wounded' by the church that I worked for.

I'm thankful for this quiet, beautiful weather to continue to work through my life :)

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