(i'm obsessed with this journal. i'm pretty sure i need it.)
I cannot even begin to formulate my thought into words that make sense right now. All I can say is, what a week, what with the disappointment of the decision being postponed (Monday at 10!) and extracurriculars, one on top of the other (OM meetings every day after school and playing piano with the band kids for their competition tomorrow.) And I scheduled my formal evaluation for today, which is nerve-wracking in itself. Also, I can't stop thinking about these horrendous car accidents that occurred on 95 this morning... breaks my heart and makes me fear for my sweet husband's safety on his commute to and from work.
It's not necessarily stress that I'm experiencing-- I'm just emotionally wiped out.
But God meets us in our tiredness; perhaps when I'm feeling my weakest, I'm more likely to turn to Him for rest. Take this afternoon, for instance. Ashley opened up her home to a small group of girls who have been working through a bible study on idols. I have absolutely loved our times together sharing a meal, laughing over stupid things, and getting real with our struggles. We were created to be in fellowship with each other; why do I find myself so often slinking back into solitude, when I know I benefit so much from walking through life with other women?
Anyways, this study really opened my eyes to ways that I continue to allow deception to worm its way into my life. That's a whole other discussion, one that I'm unable to formulate thoughts on tonight, but I will say that I feel challenged to limit my Facebook/Pinterest/Instagram time because I'm quite honestly addicted. Tonight, when I took the pup on a late walk, I left my phone at home. Normally I'd be listening to music and perusing Facebook; I would have missed out on the beauty that this night had to offer had I been plugged in reading about peoples' lives I am not a part of.
We walked to the amenity center where a huge open field invites Diego to sprint back and forth in ultimate freedom. As I stood in the middle of that dark field, I took note of the stars, which slowly revealed themselves the longer I gazed upwards. The trees reminded me of those in the northwest as the wind sighed through their branches. Ten minutes went by and a sense of 'deep peace' enveloped me; the weight that's been resting solidly on my shoulders all afternoon lifted.
With Chopin on Pandora and a sleepy pup keeping my toes warm, I'd say that this was time well spent. Maybe this no-Facebook challenge will be easier than I've imagined...
