my head is full

I miss writing regularly. Have most of my recent posts started with this statement? 

I want to capture this moment in time, deja vu in a sense because here we are, gliding through each summer's day in Frankfurt but unable to make plans farther out than a month's time. 

Patiently waiting on news of a career move for the hubs, which will move us from this city we love to an entirely new place. 

Am I ready for that? 

I'm used to this place, its quirks and barely getting by with my pigeon German skills, the intricacies and beauty of the culture and the people... the simplicity of rail travel, the joys of finding yourself in another country for the weekend for $50 and a three-hour journey. 

The move brings the opportunity to work again, and oh how I've missed it. Don't get me wrong, having a year off has been absolutely amazing-- the chance to show off this country and travel when friends and family have visited, building sweet relationships with friends whom I'll be connected with forever, and exploring who I am and what makes me tick. Despite not making enough effort to really connect with a church here, I learned to crave quiet, uninhibited mornings with a Bible in hand and nothing pressing to attend to. 

Should I have spent more time learning German? Absolutely. And I know it'll be my biggest regret. But oh, what a year it's been.

I think I'm ready to be back in the real world, one where you work and save money and have to actually clean your house regularly. The prospect of going back to work is quite daunting, especially since I'm pursuing a different career path than teaching. 

Not sure what that entails yet, and it freaks me out a bit, but I know everything will work out how it's supposed to.

For now, I'll savor these last few moments of solitude, because despite the creeping feelings of loneliness and anxiety of having wasted a year with not working,

I know there will be times where I'll look back with longing.

The weekend promises proper Frankfurt summer excursions, including but not limited to the epic flea market on the Main river, street festivals, massive football field-sized swimming pools, and maybe a picnic or two. And next weekend, our long-lost Brits will be returning to the home of schnitzels and lederhosen (both of which I spelled incorrectly and had to google for correctness.)

 Rain, rain, stay away!

There's something gratifying about picking blackberries in the waning light in the company of bunnies.