Doing Everything in Love

some things are hard to write down, especially in a public realm. but I feel like i need to get it all out and this is my preferred method to vomit out my emotions.

one of my girls who i've been close with since i've started teaching just confided to me the things she's been dealing with in her life and my heart just absolutely shattered into a million pieces. i feel like god has placed a special hurt on my heart for our teenage girls just to let them know that they are beautiful and that they don't need to conform to this world in order to feel like they have worth. i know how hard it is even now as an adult for girls to feel beautiful and i am so thankful i had (and have!) people in my life to speak love into my heart, especially when i was younger and not making the right decisions. i remember it hurting at the time, but i'm so blessed that people were there to tell me that i didn't need to do the things i was doing in high school to feel loved.

even now i really struggle with feeling like i'm doing everything i can to glorify god and that i myself have worth... and lately i've felt so overwhelmed with a sense of failure in everything that i do, that i'm not a good enough teacher, wife, "counselor" to our girls at wyldlife, but now as i sit here i'm choosing to bask in the love and purpose that God has for my life. His spirit gives me the words to say when words fail. he has placed a calling on my heart to work with our broken teenagers. he uses my own hurts and doubts and feelings of failure to be renewed every hour to point others towards Christ saving us through the cross.

i was made for this.